Yesterday was a bad day all around. It started in the morning with the typical grunting and saying "no" from Jayden while refusing to get dressed and doing anything possible to make it difficult or impossible for me. It was to the point yesterday that I finally had a breakdown and cried for 30 minutes straight. Jayden stopped his fit and stared at me. He let me put his shoes on. Then when I headed downstairs he went to his room, took off his shoes and hid them, and then ripped up a book. It was an awful morning.
Crying does not make me feel better physically. I spent the entire day yesterday feeling tired, nauseated and had no appetite. I chalked it up to the rough start. But during the night I started having it come out the lower half, if you know what I mean. Sorry TMI.
This morning I woke up and still didn't feel quite right, but knew it was a busy day at work. I was thankful Mike was home, so I didn't have to fight with Jayden. The nausea came and went. Still not much of an appetite. I ate a little for supper, but now my stomach hurts worse and is grumbling, so I'm sure that means it's gonna come out the other end sooner or later. I pray not. I'm freezing, so I took a shower, but then my face feels like it's burning up. No fever.
Here's to hoping I'm not getting the flu, especially at the beginning of the weekend. As I sit here typing this, Mike has brought Jayden up to the table for a timeout and Jayden is screaming at the top of his lungs.
Welcome to an evening in the Thielen house.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
last day of preschool
Jayden had his last day of preschool today. Or he should have had his last day of preschool. I was busy with work and asked Mike to take him. He called me about 20 minutes after preschool started and said Jayden was going back to daycare because he was in hysterics, throwing things, thrashing about, ripping things from the wall, and having the worst tantrum he's seen.
I was sad when he told me this. It was supposed to be his last day, a field trip day, a day with ice cream from SDSU, a final good bye to his teachers day. But Jayden was so angry and so out of control he had to leave.
He was still upset when I picked him up from daycare, but he seen the look on my face and knew I wasn't happy. Then he refused to walk, even as I gently pushed him along with my hand on the back of his head. He dug his feet in and would not budge. I ended up carrying him to the truck where he was like a limp doll and refused to cooperate.
And all I can think about is he acts this way because of our parenting and we should see a family counselor to figure out how to best deal with it. And my view is that there is something wrong and I want answers.
We've changed our ways. We mean what we say. We follow through with what we say. We don't give in. We give consequences and time outs. I'm just hoping something gives, and soon.
I was sad when he told me this. It was supposed to be his last day, a field trip day, a day with ice cream from SDSU, a final good bye to his teachers day. But Jayden was so angry and so out of control he had to leave.
He was still upset when I picked him up from daycare, but he seen the look on my face and knew I wasn't happy. Then he refused to walk, even as I gently pushed him along with my hand on the back of his head. He dug his feet in and would not budge. I ended up carrying him to the truck where he was like a limp doll and refused to cooperate.
And all I can think about is he acts this way because of our parenting and we should see a family counselor to figure out how to best deal with it. And my view is that there is something wrong and I want answers.
We've changed our ways. We mean what we say. We follow through with what we say. We don't give in. We give consequences and time outs. I'm just hoping something gives, and soon.
Saturday, April 23, 2011
handsome little Jayden
Just brought in the camera from the car and snapped 3 pictures of Jayden, never imagining one would come out as cute as this one!
Thursday, April 21, 2011
new neighbors
We have been so spoiled since moving into our house three years ago. We have a nice big corner lot, essentially the size of two lots combined. Our back yard is lined with lilac bushes and apple trees and one really big, almost dead, oak tree. There is a house behind us where we share a back yard, or actually property lines meet. It used to be owned by an elderly couple who have since moved out. It sat empty for over a year and was up for sale.
Well there has been movement over there lately and lights on and people walking around the back yard looking at our trees and such. Mike broke the news the other day that we have new neighbors. Right now they are painting and whatnot, but will be moving in this weekend.
It's such a privacy shock for me I can't believe it. I used to stand at my patio door in my pajamas and look around or wander out onto the deck. But now I am greeted with shades pulled, lights on, people in the back yard smoking, people in the yard. It's crazy.
We never, not once, seen the elderly couple. The only movement in the back yard was the hired help who mowed the lawn. I guess we're in for a change. I wonder how this will affect the kids and the dog. Hmmmmm. I dislike change.
Well there has been movement over there lately and lights on and people walking around the back yard looking at our trees and such. Mike broke the news the other day that we have new neighbors. Right now they are painting and whatnot, but will be moving in this weekend.
It's such a privacy shock for me I can't believe it. I used to stand at my patio door in my pajamas and look around or wander out onto the deck. But now I am greeted with shades pulled, lights on, people in the back yard smoking, people in the yard. It's crazy.
We never, not once, seen the elderly couple. The only movement in the back yard was the hired help who mowed the lawn. I guess we're in for a change. I wonder how this will affect the kids and the dog. Hmmmmm. I dislike change.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
blog changes
If you've stopped into my blog the last week or so, you may have noticed it was bright orange. I liked it at first, but decided quickly it was too bright. Let's give this a try and see how it tastes.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
shaved Macie
Macie has had bad mats on her fur and has needed shaving or trimming for months now. Last night we finally tackled that. From the front you can't tell we did much.
She then got a bath. The sounds coming out of her mouth were hilarious, not to mention she climbed the shower wall. Mike and I were laughing. Don't mind the pile of rugs and laundry...by the time we had finished there was fur everywhere! 
She's a cross between a pretty kitty and a drowned rat. 
Tonight we were able to grab her and get a few more pictures. The kids were shocked to see that her skin is also calico. 
Isn't she funny! 
Monday, April 11, 2011
Jayden
We took Jayden to the doctor on Friday for his behavior and to make sure he was healthy, or not, which it just so happens that he is not. He was put on an antibiotic again for drainage in his ear and very thick crap in his throat. That could be partially why his tantrum-like behavior has escalated lately, but definitely not the culprit.
The other part is considered to be a control issue. Surprise surprise, right? Yep, the doctor said Jayden is controlling us and basically has us paralyzed. We kind of knew that. He suggested we see a family counselor to learn different techniques on how to handle him. I've got my own thoughts on that right now and right now I plan to try something else.
Following through is what we are trying really hard with. Meaning what we say and treating him equally just like we do with the other kids. For so many years he has had "special" treatment in a way because of everything he went through the first year and so on. He's just kind of gotten away with getting his way more often than not. But not anymore.
Remember how he wouldn't clean his room? Well finally on day 3 after telling him he had to pick up his toys and throw away the wipes before he could eat lunch, he did it. But first he sat in the same corner of his room for 5 hours. How's that for stubborn and strong willed? Once he started to pick up his room it took him 20 minutes and then he came out and ate his lunch entirely. We even went to the Children's Museum that afternoon...but that's a whole 'nother post. :-)
Today we were told he had a great day at preschool with no tantrums. We'll take it as a successful day.
The other part is considered to be a control issue. Surprise surprise, right? Yep, the doctor said Jayden is controlling us and basically has us paralyzed. We kind of knew that. He suggested we see a family counselor to learn different techniques on how to handle him. I've got my own thoughts on that right now and right now I plan to try something else.
Following through is what we are trying really hard with. Meaning what we say and treating him equally just like we do with the other kids. For so many years he has had "special" treatment in a way because of everything he went through the first year and so on. He's just kind of gotten away with getting his way more often than not. But not anymore.
Remember how he wouldn't clean his room? Well finally on day 3 after telling him he had to pick up his toys and throw away the wipes before he could eat lunch, he did it. But first he sat in the same corner of his room for 5 hours. How's that for stubborn and strong willed? Once he started to pick up his room it took him 20 minutes and then he came out and ate his lunch entirely. We even went to the Children's Museum that afternoon...but that's a whole 'nother post. :-)
Today we were told he had a great day at preschool with no tantrums. We'll take it as a successful day.
Sunday, April 10, 2011
homemade play dough
I love to make homemade play dough, especially Kool-Aid play dough because it's much cheaper to make than peanut butter play dough. Both are edible, but with Kool-Aid play dough, you get to pick the color and flavor depending on the flavor of Kool-Aid you pick.
First, you have to fill the measuring cup full of flour,
using one spoonful at a time. 
Then you carefully add the salt. 
And some vegetable oil and stir. You really don't have to stir, but it gives your helper something to do while you wait for the water to boil. 
Add the Kool-Aid whenever you want. We sprinkle ours in with the dry ingredients and add the water last. I stir the water and finish making the dough because it's hot for the first five minutes or so. 
It looks kind of nasty when you first start to stir. This batch was orange. 
Once it's cooled, let your little ones play in it, roll it out, and use any simple household items to use while playing. We use orange peelers for knives, measuring cups to fill, cookie cutters to cut out, and rolling pins. Sometimes for the older kids I give them toothpicks. 
After the dough is about done, I usually add another 1-2 spoonfuls of flour, just to make the dough a little less sticky. 
Even the older kids love play dough. 
Like I said, measuring cups and orange peelers make for some simple toys. 
The imaginative play has been going on for over 3 hours now. No lie. Play dough is such a good stress reliever for kids because they can squeeze it and mold it and it also works so many of their senses. It can be kept in the fridge for a long time in bags. 
Kool-Aid Play Dough2 1/2 C Flour
1/2 C Salt
3 TB Vegetable Oil
2 Packets Kool-Aid
2 Cups Boiling Water
Mix it all together and you have lots of fun on a rainy day! Like I said, you can add more flour or water, depending on if it's too sticky or too dry. I always add extra flour. Enjoy!
Friday, April 8, 2011
taking back control
Jayden has continued to be uncooperative today. He threw himself down on the clinic floor, grunted, said no, and refused to cooperate for me, Mike or the doctor. But it's typical. And the doctor told me pretty much what I expected him to tell me. That Jayden is in control and he has us paralyzed. Oh and that he does have an infection, so he's on antibiotics.
Our doctor recommends we get use a family counselor to learn ways to get control of Jayden. This is so ironic, since this is something I would be telling one of the families I work with. However, doctor said many times with our own children we don't see it. I do see it, which is why my life is an open book to anyone who will listen about it. We've known about these problems with Jayden for years and have reached out for help, but once again, I guess the changes that need to be made are on us.
I imagine this will be tough. Jayden has had some special treatments all of his life because of our traumatic his life was for the first year. He has gained control and we have lost it. Cracking down and meaning what we say and treating everyone equal (as bad as that sounds) will be the new attempted norm until we figure out what to do with a counselor.
We started tonight. Actually continued from last night. Meaning what we say. Cleaning his room. Simply, putting his toys in his toy box. He's trying to prove he won't do it by not doing it and we're trying to prove he will do this. It could be a long weekend. Slamming his door, opening and closing, and asking questions are some of his ways of controlling us in this situation. And locking us out of his room. We changed that. His door knob is now switched around, so he cannot lock him out, but we can lock him in. In a nicer put way, he cannot continually open the door, slam it, or ask questions. He has lost that control.
So let's see how this goes, shall we?
Our doctor recommends we get use a family counselor to learn ways to get control of Jayden. This is so ironic, since this is something I would be telling one of the families I work with. However, doctor said many times with our own children we don't see it. I do see it, which is why my life is an open book to anyone who will listen about it. We've known about these problems with Jayden for years and have reached out for help, but once again, I guess the changes that need to be made are on us.
I imagine this will be tough. Jayden has had some special treatments all of his life because of our traumatic his life was for the first year. He has gained control and we have lost it. Cracking down and meaning what we say and treating everyone equal (as bad as that sounds) will be the new attempted norm until we figure out what to do with a counselor.
We started tonight. Actually continued from last night. Meaning what we say. Cleaning his room. Simply, putting his toys in his toy box. He's trying to prove he won't do it by not doing it and we're trying to prove he will do this. It could be a long weekend. Slamming his door, opening and closing, and asking questions are some of his ways of controlling us in this situation. And locking us out of his room. We changed that. His door knob is now switched around, so he cannot lock him out, but we can lock him in. In a nicer put way, he cannot continually open the door, slam it, or ask questions. He has lost that control.
So let's see how this goes, shall we?
Thursday, April 7, 2011
parenting is hard
Oh my goodness is parenting hard. At some point a few years ago I thought parenting was hard, but I think I have crossed a whole new era. Jayden has been completely defiant since 12:30 today. He was uncooperative the entire day at preschool and just kept it up at home. He refuses to do anything anyone asks. Me, his teachers, his dad. He has spent the entire afternoon and evening in his room, simply because he won't pick up his toys or throw away the garbage.
Now don't shake your head at me like that....I can tell what some of you are probably thinking and that's why I hate to put the brutal truth on here. But I'm so done letting him run my life and him choosing where we can go or what we can do. I don't think it's too much to ask for a 4 year old to pick up a few toys and put them in the toy box and to throw away the wipes that he has strewn all around his room.
However, Jayden doesn't think he needs to do this either. All we have heard tonight is "NO" in refusing to do this.
He came out to eat supper and thought he was going to play after that, but was told he had to pick up his room. How one little person can be so defiant and so stubborn and refuse to do the simplest tasks is beyond me.
I have gone as far as scheduling an appointment with his doctor tomorrow because we are at a loss as to what to do. A long time ago his doctor suggested we try a medication to help reduce the amount of energy or stamina he has during these fits, but we all agreed to wait it out a little longer. Now is the time to figure out what we do next. Is it time for another visit to behavioral health? Medicine? A deeper look into his behavior?
I find all of this to be even more frustrating because I have a degree to work with children and I currently work with several children who exhibit similar tendancies, except with my own child, I cannot figure out what works and what doesn't.
I say parenting is hard for other reasons too, but tonight, Jayden is taking the cake, and is still going strong in refusing to go to bed. It's 9pm and I'm exhausted.
Now don't shake your head at me like that....I can tell what some of you are probably thinking and that's why I hate to put the brutal truth on here. But I'm so done letting him run my life and him choosing where we can go or what we can do. I don't think it's too much to ask for a 4 year old to pick up a few toys and put them in the toy box and to throw away the wipes that he has strewn all around his room.
However, Jayden doesn't think he needs to do this either. All we have heard tonight is "NO" in refusing to do this.
He came out to eat supper and thought he was going to play after that, but was told he had to pick up his room. How one little person can be so defiant and so stubborn and refuse to do the simplest tasks is beyond me.
I have gone as far as scheduling an appointment with his doctor tomorrow because we are at a loss as to what to do. A long time ago his doctor suggested we try a medication to help reduce the amount of energy or stamina he has during these fits, but we all agreed to wait it out a little longer. Now is the time to figure out what we do next. Is it time for another visit to behavioral health? Medicine? A deeper look into his behavior?
I find all of this to be even more frustrating because I have a degree to work with children and I currently work with several children who exhibit similar tendancies, except with my own child, I cannot figure out what works and what doesn't.
I say parenting is hard for other reasons too, but tonight, Jayden is taking the cake, and is still going strong in refusing to go to bed. It's 9pm and I'm exhausted.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
shot of Cortisone
I've had a lack of blogging again I see. Tonight I'm so very tired, but my own husband was kind enough to tell me that it's been almost a week since I updated our blog. Maybe it's because I feel like nobody reads what I write or it's a fear of writing what I really want to say in moments of lull. Either way, here I am.
I went to the Orthopedic Institute on Monday to see the doctor regarding the Carpal Tunnel Syndrome in my wrist. I've already had the Nerve Conduction Test done, which definitely diagnosed it. On Monday I received my first ever shot of Cortisone. Painful is the best way to describe that. Not the kind of pain where you cry, but the kind where you tense up tight and scream OUCH. That's when the doctor asked me if it felt like he was shooting electricity up my hand. You betcha, that was it. Just like I was holding a high voltage electric fence.
Then he said my hand would feel funny and feel like it was getting full. He had me make a fist and I couldn't really do it. My whole hand felt swollen and full. It was so weird. And then it went numb for several hours. Ever try signing your name when you have zero feeling in your hand? Well, it's quite amusing. Holding the pen is a challenge in itself, yet alone trying to control a pen when you have no feeling.
I'm also in a splint for the next 8 weeks at night. And I have to take 3 Ibuprofen and 2 Tylenol all a the same time 4 times a day. That is 20 pills a day. Crazy, huh! But my hand feels amazing. It hasn't gone to sleep, itched, or tingled since I received the shot.
I went to the Orthopedic Institute on Monday to see the doctor regarding the Carpal Tunnel Syndrome in my wrist. I've already had the Nerve Conduction Test done, which definitely diagnosed it. On Monday I received my first ever shot of Cortisone. Painful is the best way to describe that. Not the kind of pain where you cry, but the kind where you tense up tight and scream OUCH. That's when the doctor asked me if it felt like he was shooting electricity up my hand. You betcha, that was it. Just like I was holding a high voltage electric fence.
Then he said my hand would feel funny and feel like it was getting full. He had me make a fist and I couldn't really do it. My whole hand felt swollen and full. It was so weird. And then it went numb for several hours. Ever try signing your name when you have zero feeling in your hand? Well, it's quite amusing. Holding the pen is a challenge in itself, yet alone trying to control a pen when you have no feeling.
I'm also in a splint for the next 8 weeks at night. And I have to take 3 Ibuprofen and 2 Tylenol all a the same time 4 times a day. That is 20 pills a day. Crazy, huh! But my hand feels amazing. It hasn't gone to sleep, itched, or tingled since I received the shot.
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